I listen

Last week I decided to take my girls to the seaside on Friday morning. I was excited about the plan and was really looking forward to it.

But when the morning came I didn’t feel that anymore. Even the thought of putting the stroller in the car, packing the snacks, clothes and toys made me tired. So I followed that instinct, drove Ajda to kindergarten and came home.

At that point I realised that my period came back. After 555 days (according to my phone app)!  I was waiting for it, expecting it and inviting it back!

That may seem weird to some of you but it is true. 3 years ago I wouldn’t be happy about it as I saw it as a problem cause. But now I was tired of my 555 days of “linearity”. It was absolutely special time of pregnancy and first post-partum months and yet I was missing my cyclic nature being expressed.

Just listen
Photo: Martina Zaletel

So I listened to my body and it wanted to rest. Luckily Tamara is a huge cuddling fan so we spent basically half of the day in bed napping and cuddling. In the afternoon my husband took the girls out and the evening was mine – ice cream in company of Eat, pray, love. That was my celebration.

Unfortunately Saturday was busy. Like really busy, all day. And I felt my need to rest, to stop but I didn’t do it. I didn’t have a chance to do so. Or better said – I didn’t decide and make a chance to do so. I am sure that I would find a way even though Dejan was absent all day. So in the evening I just fell asleep on the couch. And made an apology to my body not to listen to it. And to my Inner Wise Woman as she wanted to come forward but was put aside.

All in all, I feel that things are easier now. I understand why I was just thinking, chewing on ideas in my head but had no energy to take action this weekend – maybe prepare some blog posts or do a bunch of “necessary” things around the house. And I know that in days to come I will have energy to do all of that and more. That is the power and blessing of knowing my cycle.

Do you know yours?

You should. It holds so many keys to magic in your life.

Katarina